BP = Bad Pollution (Screed #31)

May 31, 2010…


We’ve never seen such a display of utter incompetence in handling a problem of gigantically epic proportions as the way BP has handled the Gulf oil spill. Millions of thousands of gallons of oil have spilled out, so far, and they don’t seem to have the slightest clue how to stop it. It’s like they are at the point where they’re just like, “Uhhh….anybody got any suggestions out there? Cuz we don’t know what the fuck we are doing. We ain’t got the slightest clue.” They have tried so-called “junk shots” and “top kills” and combinations of the two. They have also considered grommets and “top hats.” At one point actor Kevin Costner supposedly had a solution. Really? Is that what it’s come to? Hollywood actors are now being employed to stop the worst oil spill in the history of mankind? Well, he certainly can’t do any worse than BP’s so-called “experts.” It is completely mind-boggling how something like this can happen and that they don’t appear to have any solutions to fix it. Then again, is it really so strange? Just par for the course in these wonderful times we live in.

All the fishermen are shit out of luck, as they watch their livelihoods go down the drain, and everything under water is washing up dead as the environment takes one step closer to total ruination. Hey, we’re heading there anyhow, might as well speed up the process that much quicker, right?

BP Managing Director Robert Dudley described on a morning talk show that they don’t want to do anything that will make the situation worse. Ha! A little too late for that, isn’t Bob?

The company plans to resume trying to fix this disaster in 3 to 6 days. 3 to 6 days?? Is it vacation time over there? Are they too busy creating havoc in other parts of the world to be bothered? BP needs to be boycotted. They are obviously run by incompetence and greed. Basically like every other major corporation these days, as well as our government.

And so the world keeps on turning…


Roll Call #9

May 19, 2010…


Here are our all-time most despised athletes, coaches, team owners and sports announcers. Everyone on this list is a douchebag in their own special way (in no particular order):

Barry Bonds, Terrell Owens, Chad Ochocinco, Manny Ramirez, Eli Manning, Lawrence Taylor, Al Unser, Jr. George Steinbrenner, Curt Schilling, Jeff Gordon, Jerry Jones, Ben Roethlisberger, Randy Johnson, Gary Sheffield, Larry Bird, Phil Simms, Tom Coughlin, OJ Simpson, Ty Cobb, David Ortiz, Michael Vick, Jeff Weaver, Dustin Pedroia, Pete Rose, Diego Maradona, Bobby Knight, Derek Lowe, Frank McCourt, Jonathan Papelbon, Hank Steinbrenner, Howard Cosell, Robert Irsay, Kevin Youkilis, John Riggins, Kurt Busch, Josh Beckett, Trot Nixon, Jamie McCourt, Tom Cable, Kevin Brown, Robert Kraft, Rafael Palmeiro, Marion Jones, Tiger Woods, Jim Calhoun, John Madden, Deion Sanders, John Rocker, Adam “Pacman” Jones, Plaxico Burress, Latrell Sprewell, Jim McMahon, Eric Mangini, Brian Bosworth, Ron Artest, Kyle Busch, Mark Mangino, Tiki Barber, LeBron James, Ray Lewis, Don King, Alfonso Soriano, Scott Boras, Sean Avery, Bill Belichick, Jim Irsay, Bronson Arroyo, Peyton Manning, Daisuke Matsuzaka, Amani Toomer, Ozzie Guillen, Mark Gastineau, Larry Lucchino, Ricky Williams, Hines Ward, Bill Romanowski, Bud Selig, Jose Canseco, DeSean Jackson, Nomar Garciaparra.

Roll Call #8

May 5, 2010…


We would like to take time and honor some of our favorite athletes, coaches and sports announcers of all time (in no particular order):

Roger Staubach, Graig Nettles, Tom Landry, Tony Dorsett, Don Mattingly, Babe Ruth, Muhammad Ali, Joe Torre, Mickey Mantle, Lou Gehrig, Joe DiMaggio, Mario Andretti, Derek Jeter, Troy Aikman, Joe Montana, Moses Malone, Richard Petty, Larry Holmes, Mariano Rivera, Ron Guidry, Pele, Tommy John, Emmitt Smith, Danny White, Robert Newhouse, Brett Favre, Thurman Munson, Earl Campbell, Phil Rizzuto, AJ Foyt, Rick Mears, Tony Romo, Matt Kenseth, Joe Namath, Walter Payton, Emerson Fittipaldi, Carl Yastrzemski, Mike Schmidt, Casey Stengel, Andy Pettitte, Drew Pearson, David Wells, Jim Brown, Rocky Marciano, Dave Winfield, Paul O’Neill, Alex Rodriguez, Roger Clemens, David Cone, Michael Jordan, Joe McCarthy, Gordie Howe, Scott Brosius, Bart Starr, Ken Stabler, Randy White, Ed “Too Tall” Jones, Tino Martinez, Hélio Castroneves, Hideki Matsui, Don Drysdale, Jimmy Johnson, Whitey Ford, Billy Martin, Evander Holyfield, Tommy Lasorda, Mike Mussina, Pat Summerall, Bill White, Don Meredith, Bob Lilly, Hank Aaron, Julius Erving, Bernie Williams, Johnny Rutherford, Phil Esposito, Wilt Chamberlain, Marvin Hagler, Joe Louis, Vito Antuofermo, George Foreman, David Beckham, Goose Gossage, Arie Luyendyk, Billy Joe Dupree, Bucky Dent, Steve Garvey, Yogi Berra, Jim Plunkett, Jerry Rice, Steve Young, Bob Lemon, Steve Carlton, Don Zimmer, Willie Randolph, Frank Messer, Jay Novacek, Mel Stottlemyre, Joe Girardi, Dave Righetti, Rafael Septien, Dan Devine, Tom Sneva, Dick Tidrow, Michael Andretti, Nolan Ryan, Michael Irvin, Bucky Dent, Catfish Hunter, Warren Moon, Jason Giambi, Knute Rockne, Tom Seaver, Mario Kempes, Reggie Jackson, Gale Sayers, Sandy Koufax, Herschel Walker, Don Sutton, Vince Lombardi, Sparky Lyle, Cal Ripken, Jr., Jorge Posada, Danica Patrick, Greg Maddux, Don Larsen, D.D. Lewis, Brady Quinn, Gianluigi Buffon, Lou Pinella, Terry Bradshaw, Joba Chamberlain, Mel Renfro, Mark Teixeira, Tom Clements, Bobby Murcer, Bill Bates, CC Sabathia, Golden Richards, Jimmy Key, Lou Holtz, Joe Frazier, Mark Messier, Michael Kay, Dario Franchitti, Roy White, Lefty Gomez, Jeanette Lee, Fabio Cannavaro, Mel Allen, Bobby Unser, Ernie Shavers, Marco Andretti, Mike Pagliarulo, Wade Boggs.